Little Manhattan

How old were you when you fell in love for the first time?

Indeed love doesn’t require a certain age for someone to feel it. Usually we think that mostly people reach teenage years—or perhaps older than that—to fall in love for the first time. However, it is always possible for children under teenage age to fall in love.

That is the main theme of Little Manhattan movie. The movie is starred by John Hutcherson as Gabe, a ten-year-old boy who falls in love with Rosemary Telesco, played by Charlie Ray. The two other major characters are Leslie, Gabe’s mother, played by Cynthia Nixon, and Adam, Gabe’s father, played by Bradley Whitford.

Some interesting things I spotten from this movie are:

First, in a very young age, boys and girls keep in touch very well, play together, study together at school—for example when they attend nursery school or kindergarten. They don’t pay attention that they are two different sexes—male and female—that consequently have different anatomy of bodies. However, after they realize that they are different creatures, they start to keep distance. Gabe uses term “when a big iron wall separate us—boys and girls”. They oftentimes show disgust to each other. Boys will choose to be with boys only, mostly at school; and so will girls. They will feel embarrassed if they play with friends from different sex. Boys in this patriarchal culture are usually taught by their (patriarchal) parents that they are better than girls.

I am wondering why they should undergo this phase in their life?

It is clearly seen in the movie, where it illustrates the period of hating each other starts when they are in the first grade of elementary school. Since this movie is narrated from Gabe’s point of view, it shows us clearly how Gabe—representing boys—thinks that boys are better than girls, and that girls are just disgusting creatures. It is not clearly depicted , however, whether the girls in the movie consider boys as disgusting creatures too. Rosemary—representing girls—only says in the movie that girls get mature at a younger age than boys. From her observation on her younger sister’s school, she draws a conclusion that girls speak and walk earlier than boys do. In the Karate class where both Gabe and Rosemary attend together, Rose gets the yellow belt first while Gabe still holds the white one.

Based on my observation on my students who attend junior high school (their age ranges from eleven until fifteen years old), they always refuse when I ask them to pair up with the opposite sex. They will strongly complain me by citing their religion’s teaching that boys and girls are not supposed to keep in toush closely. They also sometimes show disgust to each other.

However, this hating the opposite sex doesn’t last forever. I suppose it is because the natural law says that boys and girls (male and female) are created to be attracted to each other; especially from heterosexual people’s point of view. In Little Manhattan, Gabe (ten years old at that time) starts to be attracted to Rosemary when they have to get a sparring-partner in their Karate class. Although at first Gabe doesn’t think it as a good thing—a boy has a girl to be the sparring-partner--, he doesn’t find any other familiar face. (Gabe and Rosemary are kindergarten classmates.) This makes their relationship closer, especially after Rose gets her yellow belt, and she offers Gabe to practice in her house. Realizing that Rose is a pretty and smart girl , Gabe feels something strange in his heart when his heart beats very strongly when looking at her. He realizes he no longer finds girls as disgusting creature anymore. It is not clear how Rose feels toward Gabe except that she enjoys their relationship; especially their fun experience when they are looking for an apartment for Gabe’s father. Gabe’s parents are still in the process of getting divorced.

Second, I am interested in Gabe’s parents’ way to explain to Gabe why they are going to get divorced. They sit together—three of them—and the parents explain what makes them conclude to be separated. The movie doesn’t illustrate it in a long scene but this part attracts me very much. I believe in Indonesia, I find very few examples of this kind of thing. “Gabe, your daddy and I have become a lot different than before. And we cannot live together anymore.” That’s what Leslie said to her only son and Adam nods to show agreement. Explaining about divorce to small kids is not an easy matter. And I really appreciate parents who talk to their children and consider them as mature so that they don’t’ need to hide the biter fact.

Another scene that attracts my attention is when Gabe asks Adam why and how love ends. Adam simply says that he and Leslie take each other’s existence in their life for granted; that they are husband and wife that are supposed to understand each other without saying things that in fact need to be said. And with so many unsaid things compiling in their mind, they realize that they suddenly feel like they face strangers, not a loved spouse anymore. So, the point is, to say everything openly to the loved one is very important so that the other party will know what we feel and think.

This conversation encourages Gabe to make up his mind—to tell his feeling toward Rosemary. The same conversation also encourages Adam to repair his relationship with Leslie.

Love is always interesting to talk about, isn’t it? :)

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